Ploomy Girl #1 Skyvillain: 10 Things Men Need to Know

8. Learn a Skill that you Can Share with Your Partner

So maybe this is just a sneaky little move on my part to plug one of my favorite ever turn ons: Guys that Cook. Guys, the way to a woman’s heart is through her stomach, it’s true! Sharing something like a delicious and unique well-cooked meal with your partner will make them appreciate you even more, and I promise you’ll get something back in return. If you are a hopeless chef like I am, you can either learn by reading various food blogs or pick up something else. Since I’m the hopeless chef, I repay my boyfriend for his delicious cocktails and meals by cleaning our apartment, doing design work for his music projects, or in other ways… Use your imagination.

9. Dating Rules Exist for a Reason

I had to learn this one the hard way. Social “rules” can be hard to pin down and are blurry depending on your morals and life philosophy, but they are important. Don’t date your friend’s ex. Don’t date someone young enough to be your daughter or old enough to be your mother. Don’t cheat or sneak around behind your partner’s back. Don’t date in the same small social circles. Don’t act desperate. Etc. The reason these “rules” exist is because they will either drive people away from you or lead to a lot of pain and heartbreak. If something feels wrong, I know you’re going to be even MORE attracted to it, but in the long run it will probably not lead to good things and doing things you know might hurt other people doesn’t make you such a great person.

10. Stick A Fork in It

Perhaps the biggest mistake made in relationships is not knowing when to quit. This is confusing grey area, to be sure, but in the end you need to trust your instincts. I’m not that dense, I realize the people tend to stay in relationships they are not happy with because they are lonely, like the sex, or because they are too scared to get out. I find this to be really lame and a disservice to everyone. Constantly second guessing your relationship doesn’t exactly lead you to be your comfortable fun-loving self, and staying in a relationship you aren’t into is simply a waste of time. I’ve found that when I dated guys who acted aloof and mysterious, it was intriguing at first but after a few months it gets really, really old. If you’re there for the sex then you need to make your intentions clear and stick with them—your partner will appreciate your honesty and maybe you can work out the perfect arrangement. If not, move on, and don’t look back.

The truth is, everything I’ve said here applies to women as much as it applies to men and I certainly think most women (including me) have a lot to learn. Trust your instincts. Realize that you will get back what you give, and that you have control over the sorts of people you attract. Don’t be a lazy slob and spend all your time playing World of Warcraft. Be true to yourself and the people around you. Keep doing what you love and people will notice. Nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes, but if you are patient and work on making your life the best it can be, I guarantee you will find what you are looking for.

xo
Lydia W

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