Since the dawn of mankind, men and women have boggled their minds trying to understand one another. Moreover, men have struggled to figure out what it takes to make the women in their lives happy.
Honestly guys, while women can be very complex, most don’t require much to keep them happy. I asked both single and attached women alike, “What does it take to keep you happy in a relationship?” In no particular order, here’s how they answered in the form of ten helpful tips.
photography by kalandrakas
1) Be yourself. This is the probably the easiest piece of advice one could give you, but it’s simply the truth. For instance, don’t act like a “bad boy” just because she’s only dated “bad boys” in the past. There’s a reason why she fell for you in the first place, so just continue being yourself, cause it’s working for you.
2) Do little things for her. Offer to pick-up her dry cleaning or buy her a bag of her favorite gummy bears; these simple gestures show that you care and are thinking of her on a regular basis, says Patty, 26. There’s a fine line though, she continues, “Don’t get whipped. You gotta have some of your own stances to remain of interest to her.”
3) Appreciate her. Remember to say please and thank you, and don’t be afraid to tell her that you appreciate all she does for you. Nidia, 28 says, “I have a sense of value about myself and I want to know that he values me just as much.” Not taking each other for granted and appreciating her is key in a good relationship.
4) Keep your eyes on her. Girls get that guys have a wandering eye—a Victoria Secret model look-alike comes in your line of vision, and we know you’re going to gawk! (Girls do it too, but we’re just more tactful and/or slick about it.) When you’re with your girl, be respectful and keep all googly-eyed staring to a minimum. This is not to say only have eyes for her, but definitely be mindful that this behavior may bother her and mess with her self-confidence.
5) Keep her laughing. A good sense of humor is another no-brainer way to keep your girl. Kudos to you if making her laugh comes naturally, but don’t worry if she doesn’t get your humor right off. Keep her laughing, as “it will be harder to make her mad with a smile on both your faces,” proclaims Patricia, 29.
6) Take interest in something she’s passionate about. You love sports and she loves the ballet. It’s not necessary to be into the same things, however, understanding the reasons why she’s passionate about ballet wouldn’t be a bad idea. Showing interest in something she cares about shows you care about her, and infinitely makes her feel good about herself and the relationship.
7) Keep yourself groomed. Okay, you got her…but that’s not an open invitation to stop caring about your appearance! Keep eating healthy and hitting the gym. Continue to shave (unless she likes you scruffy), trim unwanted ear and nose hairs, and wear clean and stylish clothes. (If you never cared much about these grooming rituals, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to start.)
8) Be open to getting to know her family and friends. “If he is open to the idea [of getting to know them], it means he cares about knowing who is important in your life, and the people that helped shape the way you are,” states Kyla, 25. It’s a great way to show your gal that you’re serious; a commitment statement. “Also, having a guy who is confident enough to have fun hanging out with [your] friends is a great trait.”
9) Be considerate. For instance, if you’re running late to meet her or decided to join a few co-workers for drinks before heading home, be considerate and let her know. I know what you’re probably thinking—it’s unnecessary because you don’t keep tabs on each other and she’s not your “keeper”. That’s not the case at all. “Telling us ahead of time that you have to cancel or are running late is always a good idea and will result in a better outcome…especially if an argument is involved,” says Patricia, 29.
10) Be open to trying new things. Don’t let your relationship become too predictable and monotonous. Keep things fresh – be willing to try new things together. “It keeps [the relationship] enjoyable and you learn more about the person’s likes and dislikes,” Monina, 25 says.
Obviously, there are some girls that require much more attention and care than the aforementioned. Provided she’s not super needy or a gold-digger, following these simple tips can make a difference in your relationship, whether it’s new and blossoming or long-term and solid.